the sound of Rain

I can't give it to you here. It's a sound, and anyway, if I recorded it, it wouldn't be the same. Maybe a part of it is that you can't control it, can't call it on demand. It comes when the clouds are full and softens everything, calms the earth for as long as it will. I can't think of many sounds that are more gentle, can't really even describe what it is exactly, because the words don't add up to the sound or the feeling. Who's surprised? Get deep enough into words and realize that they really only go so far. But still, remembering the sound is good...

++++++

A: OK, so I've made a list of reasons why you should go to Barista with me.

S: Oh no, I can't.

A: So, you'll study, and then have your Hindi lesson...

S: No, I said no.

A: ...then, we'll walk down the hill, and that'll be really good because it will get you all focused because all your [makes swirling gesture around head] things will be moving...

S: No, I'm not going.

M: Who'se going to Barista?
S: Not me.

A: ...and then, we'll get there, and you'll be all focused and we can do homework...

S: No, I can' t go, I never get anything done.

A: ...and it'll be really good and we really will do homework...

S: Do you need any help getting things together?
M: No, only with the second thing.

A:...and I'll make sure that you do homework and I'll do homework too.

S: What? No, I am not going to Barista. I need to stay here and get some solid work done.

A: OK, fine, that's fine. I'll just go to my room and cry.

S: OK. Let me know when you're done.

++++++

We find home in the most unexpected places, don't we? In a book, in a sound, in a house, in a freezing-cold-unfortunate-excuse-for-a-guest-house-with-a-manager-who-sings-a-little-while-he-works-so-his-voice-echoes-in-the-high-cold-rooms. Maybe they're not so unexpected, maybe we knew we would find them, and that's why we're here, why we keep searching, why we go out even though we're scared to death. Maybe that's why this up-and-down life works out, because even when we're sulky and anxious, sometimes it starts to rain on the walk home and we find our scorched and stinging hearts cooled and softened.